Friendship

By Val

Wow! January 14th was the last blog entry, almost a month ago. Sad day. I guess we have been just so busy with school starting up again and all. Plus, I always think these blogs have to be these great epiphanies or these huge informational bulletins so I sometimes shy away from writing them. But honestly, when I read my friends blogs, I just like hearing where their heart is. What they're thinking and how they are doing. It warms my heart to hear about their lives. So here I go.

Oh San Diego, where do I start. I never thought I'd feel this empty home sick feeling. Me! The girl pulling at the bit at every turn. But yea, I really do miss everyone in AZ. It's crazy how much community there I really had. Especially since I had just gotten to the age where I was beginning to explore the beautiful gift of friendship God has given to me in my mom.

Anyways, so yea, it's tough finding friends, especially when we haven't been around most weekends. But I feel like I've always struggled making friends. I feel like it's never been easy. I still remember in 7th grade, I would come home devastated because I didn't know how to talk to the people in my class. My mom just said "smile, and ask how they're doing". That's it! But these simple words became "abracadabra" for me in opening the door to friendships. However, these friendships were shallow because I wasn't willing to put myself out there. If any of my friends asked ME how I was doing I would throw on my mask and become whoever they wanted me to be. Over the years God has taught me how to take off this mask, but I still realize what a long process takes to make these transparent friendships.

My friend Laura and I were "friends" since we were 6! But we never become true friends until we both started going through rough patches and began trusting each other with our junk. That wasn't until COLLEGE. That's like what? 12 Years? I totally hope it won't take me another 12 to learn that lesson here in San Diego. But it was worth it. I know that we will be friends until the end because we have walked with each other through all our junk.

Then is my whirlwind friend Loren. We went from outright hate for each other to BFF status in like 2ish years! Crazy! What was the difference? I think it's because she taught me how to really listen. How to not judge others, because it's only by God's grace that I'm not in their position. I think God also taught me alot about humilty in those years. Loren was so faithful though. So loyal and trustworthy. I thank God everyday for her, and what she taught me about friendship and what she continues to teach me.

Then there's my roomates, Becca, Alicia, Katy and Amber. God did a powerful work in me through them. Before that, I always considered myself a tom boy because my brothers were always my best friends. I just didn't think I could have alot of female friendships in my life. However, each one of these girls stripped me bare of these lies in their own ways and in God's perfect timing. I still remember to this day walking with Becca down campus one day from a bible study. And afterwards thinking..."wow! I really liked talking with this girl. You know, I think I actually like talking with other girls". Of course Alicia, Katy and Amber are not typical girls, yet I've loved them all the more because of that. They are so eccentric and individualistic. It's amazing just to be around them. They have taught me so much about life and just learning to be myself. I love them so much I can't even put into words!

Then there's those precious three girls that God put in my life at just the right time. Giving me hope and a passion for what I'm doing right now. Krystal, Maggie and Lauren our precious, precious gems. I have loved their friendship, insights, passions and honesty. I would not be the same person without them. All of them so so beautiful both insided and out. I'm just so sad that I'm not there as they continue to blossom into the women of God that He has called them to be.

Ah yes, and my heart friends. Sarah and Michelle. Even typing this..I just miss them so much. It's so beautiful to be able to share hard life stuff with someone who not only cares about you, but also looks out for you AND most importantly understands personally why this God stuff is so important. I love these ladies so much I tear up just writing about them. They showed me what true heart friends are. True heart friends are women who love God so much that they're love just spills out onto others. Thanks girls. I look foward to all that God has in store for us and our friendships even though they it looks much different now because of distance.

So, it's no wonder that it's hard for me to make friends. The bar is set so high already. But I know God will do it all in his timing. I just have to wait on Him and remember that he is far better then anything I know or ask for. Or as my new friend Jenelle shared, God asks us "Aren't I better then...." even if it's something as dear to me as a new heart friend. So yes Lord, you are far better then even friends.

Psalm 119:76
May your unfailing love be my comfort, according to your promise to your servant.

Catching the Vision

So, last week Valerie and I were at the Navigator's HQ at Glen Eyrie in Colorado Springs, CO to talk to students from all over the nation about what they will be doing after they graduate from college. The event was called EDGE Preview and the main reason for the conference was to inform students about what it is like being on EDGE Corp staff with the Navigators. Valerie and I had gone to this before we were students in '06, and it was a major blessing for us to be able to process how we felt God was leading us as we looked to graduate at the end of that year.

This time we were here as staff who have gone through almost 2 years of EDGE Corp and were excited to talk to students and help them to discern how God was leading THEM as they looked to graduate! To be able to speak into a student's life at such a vulnerable and uncertain time as this was thrilling as well as encouraging!

Valerie and I had many great, meaningful conversations while we were there. There were 200+ students that attended the Preview in January, almost an even split of 100 guys and 100 girls. There were about 7 EDGE Corp men to meet with 100 guy students and about the same for the girls side of things. The goal was that every student who comes to the Preview get at least one good conversation with at least 1 full-time EDGE person. So you can tell that it was going to be a very intense couple of days for us staff. But it was worth it!

The thing that I saw that had the biggest impact on the students was not the information about EDGE Corp or the Navigators, but the vision that was cast about making disciples for a life time.

Matthew 28:19,20 says "Therefore go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit teaching them to obey all that I have commanded you. And lo, I am with you always, even to the very end of the age."

This verse is very explicit about what all believers are to be doing with their lives: making disciples. So that is really what this 2 day conference was about, how to be intentional about making disciples after graduating from college.

The students heard from many different Navigator leaders about what this can look like after college and of all the different opportunities to serve with the Navigators after college that doesn't have to look like full-time ministry on a campus somewhere.

For me, this was not just a time to meet new students and engage them in conversation, but was also a time for me to catch up with some friends that I hadn't seen in months. One of my favorite times was just walking and talking with my friend Brad. I hadn't seen him in quite a while, so I was itching to get some one-on-one time with him and hear about what God has been doing in his life. It was so encouraging as I listened to him to see how he has been living out the Matthew 28 command to make disciples where he was at in life! He isn't a full-time ministry worker, but just a normal 9-5 worker who is making disciples of Jesus even at work! That is what it looks like to live out our command to make disciples!

Another thing that I felt was really impactful was when the students looked at the Navigator calling statement which says:

To advance the gospel of Jesus and His kingdom into the nations, through spiritual generations of laborers, living and discipling among the lost.

They were challenged to think about how they can be doing this now while in college and what practical steps they can take to make sure that they are doing this even after they graduate.

All in all, the conference was a success. We were not recruiting to the Navigators, but to the vision of a life time of laboring to make disciples of Jesus right where they are at in the normal pathways of life!

Year One: the learning curve

Valerie and I celebrated our one year anniversary yesterday! Hooray! I just want to say that it has been the most amazing year of my adult life! I cannot believe that God has brought such a beautiful, intelligent, wise, hard-working, prudent, loving, and godly woman into my life! There are a couple of verses from Proverbs that immediately come to mind when I think of Valerie:

Proverbs 18:22 "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord."

Proverbs 19:14 "House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord."

I can say confidently that God has given me a fantastic woman with whom I am very excited about spending the rest of my life with! She is my best friend in the world!

However, I did not blog to just brag about my wife and how awesome she is :), but I am writing about a couple lessons and experiences that I have had these last 12 months.

Valerie and I have gone through 3 major changes in our lives within the last year of being married:
1. Being married. It is a drastic change from being single, as you can well imagine.
2. Valerie quitting her job as a teacher and joining me on Navigator staff.
3. Moving to San Diego to help restart the ministry at SDSU!

Each of these changes in and of themselves are huge, and to experience them all in one year made this year seem to go by quickly and slowly simultaneaously! Valerie and I have learned many lessons about ourselves and God through each of these big changes but the three that most stick out to me are:
1. His sovereignty
2. His goodness
3. His faithfulness

Each one of these experiences made me confront each of these aspects of God's character in a new way. Every time Valerie and I experienced one of these big changes I asked God different questions because I doubted that He would act in accordance to His nature. For instance: "God, are you really going to provide for us to be married?" or, "God, do you REALLY want us to move to San Diego now? We thought that the plan was to move 2 years from now!" or, "God, will you REALLY provide for us to move to San Diego and minister on the campus of SDSU?"

These are just examples of the myriad of questions that both Valerie and I asked God this year. And you know what we found to be true? That God will ALWAYS be true to His nature! It may not line of with what we think we need or want in the moment, but God is faithful to turn our hearts to His ways and to rest and wait upon the Lord!

I would like to end with a few more verses that remind me of God's sovereign plan for our marriage.

Psalm 139:16b "...And in Your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them."

Jeremiah 29:11 " 'For I know the plans that I have for you', declares the Lord, ' plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope."

Even though these are from the Old Testament, I think that the underlying truth is that God has already written all the days of mine and Valerie's life, and He is faithful to bring them about. He is also in the process of making sure that the plan that He has for us happens, and that it is for His ultimate glory and our good! I look forward to the day when our future and hope with Jesus Christ is finally fully consummated in us being with Him in His presence forever and ever!

Purpose and Potential

by Val,

Snow is a funny thing...

This summer I kinda felt like snow. Not cold and white, but rather unmoving and fragile. Whereas water gushes and flows, snow sits silently while it waits. It sits there for who knows how long just waiting to melt.

This summer I forgot that snow melts. Also, that snow has a purpose, and a potential. You see, without the cold of snow, the internal mechanism of some plants would never allow them to germinate. The seeds become plants only after they have been touched by the frost of snow. God also had a purpose for my time of snow. He never wastes time ever,He always has a purpose for what he is doing.

Snow also has the potential to become life giving water. The funny thing is though, snow can't just will itself to magically become water. It has to wait on the sun to melt it. In a similar way, no matter how much I wanted to move, it didn't make a difference because I still had to wait for God to provide the funding.

So now here we are at the next chapter. Now that we are moved, how will I use this time? When snow melts sometimes it still just sits there in a puddle. Other times it mixes with dirt and creates messy mud sludges. However, other times this water seeps into the ground, to where it is no longer seen and gives life to the grass and plants around it. It dies to itself.

John 12
24I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.

My prayer is that Ryan and I learn to die to self while at San Diego State. That we model Christ in serventhood, grace and truth. Our goal is to make our house a place of refuge where students can come and experience Jesus everytime. That "in everything we would set the students an example by doing what is good." Titus 2:7. That I would "teach what is good. " Titus 2:5 to the younger women. That we would both be "active in sharing our faith, so that we would have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ." Philemon 6.

We ask that you would keep these verse in mind while you pray with us.

John 12:24
Titus 2:7
Titus 2:3
Philemon 6